Do you ever sit down and reflect on the past month as a new month begins? I know a lot of us do, myself included. I do this to remember the good moments and to also think of the bad moments and to reflect on how I got through them. I feel that each new month is a time of new starts or a time of getting my life together…….finally. If my life ever “got together”, I’m not quite sure I would know what to do with myself. I am so use to running on auto pilot and frantic stressed mode that to not have those modes would seem foreign to me.
I start December off with bringing my oldest home from the hospital. All is well which I am thankful for. My oldest is pregnant (Yay!!!!!!) and due in February and was having some pain in her back so we took her to the hospital and they admitted her overnight to help treat the pain and make sure that baby is doing well. Now, if you are a parent, you know that no matter the age of your child, you are in instant parent mode when they are hurt or ill and do everything in your power to help ease their pain and discomfort. To leave your child in the hospital, even just for one night, is heart wrenching but it had to be done. I did wake at 6 am to her awake and not wanting to wake her husband, who stayed by her side overnight; she and I talked a bit and she sent me sound clips of the baby’s heartbeat. The most wonderful sound a mother can hear is her child’s heartbeat; whether it be child or grandchild, the heartbeat is a truly powerful sound that can instantly soothe a person. It is moments like these that bring us closer together and that create these memories that we can relive many times over with happiness.
The bad part of all this is that I woke up with my entire body, minus hands and feet, covered in hives. Imagine looking in the mirror and seeing half your face red and swollen after thinking you got an excellent night’s rest. My mind betrayed me!!!! This isn’t the first time I have broken out in hives, this would be the second time in a month that it has been this bad. Last time involved 2 trips to the emergency room and being hooked up to a heart monitor as they shot me full of allergy medications and histamine blockers to try to ease my discomfort and pain. After that ordeal, I saw an allergy specialist and those tests came back good. Nothing new on the results so I left with his words of calling him for more tests if the hives happened again, which he was sure wouldn’t. In fact, he assured me that it was an extremely low likely hood that they would return as he felt it was a complete fluke that I had them this bad with no previous outbreaks. Well…….THEY DID!!!!!! I don’t mind the small patches I occasionally get as I can usually cover them with clothing of some sort, but my face……..not really possible when you work with the public and your uniform does not involve face coverings. In fact, my work attire enhances my face as my hair must be pulled back away from my face so my face, ears, neck and all those lovely patches of hives can be seen and gawked at by every single person who walks through the door. I fully believe that everyone is beautiful in some way, but red patches and swollen eyelids does not help my confidence when people are very vocal about what they see and asking if you are alright. Maybe I could get a name tag that read “My name is Melanie. Please do not comment on my unattractive splotches as I am aware that they are there. No! I am not contagious”. If only it was that simple.
Ahhhh life, how entertaining you are. I can’t wait to see what adventures December brings!